For a long time, I tried different ways to fulfill my life, be it academics, worldly achievements, social acceptance, you name it. Yet at a certain point, I got exhausted. You know how you get exhausted of not even doing, but just trying? I was exhausted of searching for empty things, and I soon dreaded to end up “going with the flow” and chase what the rest around me were chasing.
While at school, I had two best friends who believed in Jesus as their Savior. Throughout the years, I would notice something special that would brighten up their smiles every day, and I longed for whatever that was. So, college glistening as my last hope, I was determined to try out a Christian fellowship. If this doesn’t work, I thought, then, I don’t know what else will.
That’s when I found Chi Alpha. Among the confusion of moving in, shuffling books, and figuring out schedules, I was instantly drawn by its strong sense of community, love, and genuine pursuit for the Lord. I barely had any “experience” to prepare me for what was to come, but I’m glad for that, because that curiosity pulled me even further into what He had in store for me. Looking back at my first year, Chi Alpha offered me far more than I ever hoped for: a safe home, a God-centered family, and most of all, a starting point on my walk with Jesus.
One of the events that greatly impacted me was Night Watch. This was a great combination of both collective worship as well as a personal time with the Lord. As a new believer, having that “unlimited” time with Him helped me greatly in my walk. Curiously enough, Night Watch would come when I “didn’t feel like” talking and thanking Him. One night, a keynote speaker came to spur revival among us, and I was encouraged to seek for the Lord for myself. I wasn’t sure how to do it, or what to expect. Yet, surely enough, I felt everything that I was holding onto for so long – earthly success, self-love, past hurts, etc. – deemed utterly worthless and was cast far away. In return, I received the love and peace only the Lord can give. It was a powerful moment, and since then I approach His throne with more boldness, being incessantly reassured that I am Her daughter, regardless of what I did in the past or did not do in the present.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. – 2 Corinthians 12:9